My name is Audrey. I am a therapist in Chandler, AZ. I have been working with clients for over 30 years, and I have been extensively trained on the most highly researched therapeutic methodologies, and have trained other therapists.
And yet…
Not everyone is a good fit for my services. Just as not everyone is a good fit for other therapists. Psychotherapy has been studied so thoroughly that many of its principles are considered a “hard science,” meaning that they are not subjective and easily proven.
Yet, even though therapy has a scientific, effective approach, there is a component to therapy that is sometimes just as important: the relationship you have with your therapist.
We call this the “Therapeutic Alliance”
It is a term that means the trust and collaboration that we – meaning, your therapist and you – have to work together for your mental health.
Studies have frequently shown that this “alliance” – this connection and mutual trust, respect, and goal setting – is incredibly important, and why it’s so critical to find a therapist that you really, really trust to help you with your anxiety and other mental health needs.
How Important is the Therapeutic Alliance?
Multiple, studies have shown that the therapeutic alliance plays a role in a significant number of outcomes – in fact, there is some research that it predicts it. The quality of a person’s therapy is important, but so is the connection they have with their therapist.
And this makes sense.
Therapy requires you to:
- Keep an open mind.
- Trust the process.
- Try things you may be uncomfortable with.
- Come to each appointment.
- Be willing to share your thoughts/feelings/experiences.
- Agree upon the approaches used.
It’s very difficult to do that when you’re with a therapist you have no connection with. You have to have that trust and mutual respect to know that you’re on a path to better wellness, and to make sure that you’re continuing to recover and thrive.
There is even a neuroscience component to this. From a neurobiological standpoint, a strong alliance functions like a secure attachment cue, engaging social-safety mechanisms that down-regulate threat responding and support learning.
For example, when we are faced with fears and negative thoughts, there is research that shows that the more we trust we can rely on someone, the easier it is to face those thoughts. The connection with a therapist helps to reduce that threat, with a feeling of a shared burden and, ideally, a shared path towards overcoming it.
When we know we have someone we can turn to, we have someone we can rely on to stand in the way of our thoughts during our day to day lives. While a therapist is not a friend in that sense, they are someone that provides some of the social and psychological benefits of a close friendship, as you can have them be someone that has a role in being there for you when you need them most.
So What Happens When You Have a Strong Therapist Client Relationship?
When you have that relationship with a therapist you can really trust, your treatment becomes more effective because you will be more engaged. You’ll feel safer emotionally. You are more likely to attend sessions and feel interested in them. You have less stress to help you promote better healing and you are open to sharing and to the feedback you receive.
How Do I Know if the Fit is Right?
The challenge, of course, is trying to determine if we’re a good fit, or if you’d fit better with someone else. That starts with a phone call and an initial consultation. It’s sort of like shopping around for the best price, but in this case it’s shopping around for the therapist you feel most connected to, because once you have that connection – assuming, of course, that they also have the expertise – you’re improving your ability to gain real progress from each and every session.
Therapy is a science, and the methods we use, like CBT, are backed by strong research. But the relationship with your therapist is also healing. Find someone you really connect with and you’ll be better putting yourself on a path towards wellness.